May 2008 Archives

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. —2 Corinthians 10:3-5

Young David was undeterred by the huge champion Goliath. Unlike his fellow Israelites, he did not compare Goliath’s size and strength with his own. He compared the strength of Goliath with his God. This comparison gave David the courage to fight for the reputation of God.

The world of biblical parenting is full of modern day Goliaths. The 21^st century thinks it has little need of God. Many attempt to redefine Christianity. Oprah Winfrey recently stated that she has come to see her Christian faith as a faith of feeling rather than believing. Experience and feeling are to be trusted; belief and objective truth are to be abandoned.

Memorial Day calls Americans to take time to consider the sacrifice that so many have made to allow this country to be free. As the white markers at  Arlington National Cemetery vividly depict, this sacrifice often involves the  loss of life. It is no small thing to give one's life that others may benefit. Certainly, those in the military should be appreciated for their willingness to make this sacrifice. This holiday is a reminder that there is more to life than living.

God calls his people to consider him first in this life. This means putting aside your own desires and embracing God’s ways. In one sense this is also a sacrifice, as Jesus says in Matthew 16. Raising children involves much sacrifice. But this sacrifice must be for God’s sake, not primarily for the sake of your children. Parents, to be faithful shepherds you must be willing to lose your life for the glory of God. By being willing to lose your life you are then able to take hold of life that is truly life. It is this singular vision that speaks powerfully to your children about your love for Jesus Christ.

The ultimate remembrance for Christians is the life, death and resurrection of Christ. His death brought life and purpose to our lost souls. So while our nation sets aside a day each year to remember the deaths of those serving in battle, as Christians, each day should be a memorial day. Each day we should remember the sacrifice made for us so that we might live for the glory of God. We are not our own.

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. — Matthew 16:25

I am grateful to you, the readers of this blog, for your participation in this new online community. Biblical parenting is both challenging and rewarding. This blog is one way to find encouragement as you face the challenges of addressing more than outward behavior in raising your children. Your reading of the blog and your comments are certainly an encouragement to me. Please continue to pray that God would richly bless our efforts to shepherd our children to love Jesus Christ deeply from the heart.

Who is this uncircumcised Philistine that he should defy the armies of the living God? I Samuel 17:26

Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God. 37 The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine." I Samuel 17:36-37

It is possible that after these last few posts some of you may be thinking that I have a problem with the news media. Actually, my purpose is to encourage families to recognize God for who he is and raise their children accordingly. Christians must care deeply about the reputation of God—the glory of God—and how we add or detract from that reputation in our daily lives. (See Ezek. 36:16-36.) On the one hand, God is certainly not in need of our recognition. On the other hand, you and your children were designed by God to live for his glory and bring honor to his name. That is what it means to have a Godward orientation (chapter 3 of Shepherding a Child’s Heart). So my focus is not primarily on the news media, but upon parents giving their children a vision for adding to the reputation of God.

O LORD, our Lord,
  how majestic is your name in all the earth! Psalm 8:9

The heavens declare the glory of God;
  the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Psalm 19:1

For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. 17 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.  Colossians 1:16-17

Parents, you should not expect or trust the news media to tell your children the truth about God and his power. The press of the 21^st century will not knowingly do that. “So,” you might reply, “what’s the point? Of course I don’t expect the press to tell my children the truth about God.” Exactly! So who will tell your children about the glory and majesty of God?

"The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. 25 And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. 26 From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. 27 God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us. 28 'For in him we live and move and have our being… Acts 17:24-28a

The disciples went and woke him, saying, "Master, Master, we're going to drown!" He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm. "Where is your faith?" he asked his disciples.  In fear and amazement they asked one another, "Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him." Luke 8:24-25

Current events, admittedly, is a subjective topic. To an historian or geologist, current could mean anything in the last 100 years. To someone trading the stock markets, current could mean something happening in the last 10 minutes. And then, of course, there is the issue of deciding what is an event that is worthy of being labeled as a current event. In reality, news reporting is a highly subjective process. For some, the annual Country Music Awards show last night was a current event. Later this week, the new Indiana Jones movie will debut. The intrigue of the presidential campaign vies for the attention of the media. If you are a sports fan, the NBA playoffs are in progress, however slow that progress may be.

For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. 17 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:16-17

In the latest mini-post I referenced the death and destruction that have occurred in Burma and China in the last few days. As of this date the AP reports that in Myanmar as many as 128,000 have died and over 2 ½ million have been severely impacted by the cyclone which devastated that region on May 3^rd of this year. In China, a 7.9 magnitude earthquake struck the  central part of that country this past Monday. The death toll is now estimated by the Chinese government to reach as high as 50,000. Fox News reports a Chinese government official as stating that over 4 million homes have been shattered in the region of the quake.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
       and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea...     Psalm 46:2

You have, no doubt, read or heard of the devastation in Burma and now in China. Tens of thousands are dead and many more are homeless. What do you think of these events? Why did they happen?

Your children are asking these questions. God wants you to give answers that will bring honor to him.

If you have questions about these events, please share them with us. The next post will look at what God has to say regarding what he has brought about.

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. 2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:1-2

Modern culture has developed a curious practice for giving appreciation to others. It is a mixture of style and substance, with the emphasis on style. This practice is called Day. Day is an extremely flexible and adaptable concept. While Day has no particular religious significance, it is nonetheless observed with ritual and sacrifice. All one has to do to make Day fit almost any relational circumstance is to add an appropriate adjective. For example, there is Valentine’s Day, Secretary’s—oops, make that Administrative Professional’s—Day, Birth Day, Memorial Day, Labor Day. Day is able to adapt to almost any desire to show appreciation. Father’s Day and the just-celebrated Mother’s Day make Day a personal event. There is even a Day for gratitude. The retail industry is more than happy to help with the appreciation celebrations. Right now, Mother’s Day promotions are being replaced rapidly with themes for grads and dads.

The law from your mouth is more precious to me
  than thousands of pieces of silver and gold. Psalm 119:72

Parenting that honors God must be consistent with what God says about himself in Scripture. Your appreciation and awe for God and his Son must increase, not decrease. In any relationship, if you begin to take someone for granted the strength of that relationship begins to decrease. Taking God for granted, as in not having growing love for him, will lead to inconsistency in the things you say and the things you do.  Children show particular expertise in detecting inconsistencies in parents. If you talk to you children about a God who is wonderful, about a Savior who means everything to you, but then you are down and discouraged about some event that didn’t go your way, you are being inconsistent. Your testimony about the wonder of God is diminished your children’s eyes.

But those who hope in the LORD
  will renew their strength.
  They will soar on wings like eagles;
  they will run and not grow weary,
  they will walk and not be faint.  —Isaiah 40:31

The Bible frequently describes the Christian life using the language of warfare. We are to overcome evil with good. We are to fight the good fight. We are to put on the full armor of God. The Word is the sword of the Spirit. This imagery is not given to alarm us but to remind us that the world around us is not a friendly place for Christians. But while the world is not friendly, God himself provides refuge and encouragement.

The task of parenting is indeed a daunting one. It is a huge responsibility that can be overwhelming. Humanly speaking, it can even be frustrating. Where do we turn for support and relief?

I run in the paths of your commands,

for you have set my heart free. —Psalm 119:32

In our last full post we talked about teaching our children to evaluate the impact of the entertainment in their lives. This raises an important point about the role of the Bible in parental instruction. God wants us to rely upon the Scriptures in all areas of our life. On the basis of passages like 2 Peter 1:3-4 and 2 Timothy 3:15-17 we affirm that the Bible is the only perfect or infallible rule for faith and life.

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Since there have been a few comments regarding the posts on praise and criticism here is a mini-post addressing a question from Dan.

Sometimes parents hesitate to give praise for fear of encouraging pride and boasting. That is certainly understandable, and we need to think carefully how we offer praise so we're not simply building up an ungodly, self-centered arrogance. Godly praise, on the other hand, is an opportunity to encourage your children by acknowledging God’s help and kindness to them. For example,

 Yes, Cameron, I saw you gave your truck to Colin. Remember how we prayed that God would help you to be unselfish? I think he answered that prayer and helped you to share, didn't he? That's wonderful!

 Hailey, you did a good job cleaning your gerbils' cage. I noticed you were thorough, even though it's not a fun job ... Isn't it satisfying to do your work well? God made us to take care of our world, and we are blessed when we obey him in that way.

 Michael, thanks for getting your homework done before you got on Facebook. I know it's hard to learn self-control, but God really does help you when you ask him, and I'm very happy to see you growing like that.

Parents, when your child does something good (even if it was just a simple duty), give encouragement in a God-honoring way. If you remind them of God’s mercy and kindness and point them to loving gratitude, then you can freely express genuine and enthusiastic joy at their obedience without promoting pride.

Thanks for the questions and interaction!

See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. —Colossians 2:8

Above all else, guard your heart,
       for it is the wellspring of life. — Proverbs 4:23

A Guide to Entertainment

You and your children are targets of a subtle but vicious enemy. The enemy is a master of deception and stealth. He knows that if he attacks openly he will be recognized for who he is. So this enemy plans his attacks when they are least expected. He has no sense of fair play. He looks for the times when you and your family are the most vulnerable. His desire is to create as much destruction and mayhem in your lives as he can. Am I talking about Osama bin Laden? No, actually, this enemy is more dangerous and cunning than bin Laden. The apostle Paul warns against being taken captive by this enemy, and Solomon says to guard your heart. Both are speaking about the world as influenced by Satan (I John 2:15-17; Ephesians 2:1-3).