August 2008 Archives

I know that the LORD is great,
    that our Lord is greater than all gods.
The LORD does whatever pleases him,
    in the heavens and on the earth,
    in the seas and all their depths.
He makes clouds rise from the ends of the earth;
    he sends lightning with the rain
    and brings out the wind from his storehouses. Psalm 135:5-7

Hurricane season has arrived. This evening Gustav is headed toward the Louisiana coast. Hanna is lingering just east of the Bahamas and a strong tropical wave has formed just off the coast of Africa. As you view the progress of Gustav through the Gulf of Mexico you will hear many predictions about what Gustav will or will not do. Sophisticated satellite tracking and imagery provide minute by minute reports about Gustav and what this may mean for the Gulf Coast in general and New Orleans in particular. At this moment the speculation is about whether Gustav will re-intensify to a Category 4 status before making landfall.

When David was told, "Uriah did not go home," he asked him, "Haven't you just come from a distance? Why didn't you go home?" 2 Samuel 11:10

The second common form of deceit is that it offers a shortcut to what we want. The real truth behind this shortcut is that we assume we know better than God what is good for us. It is ironic that these shortcuts usually involve much more planning and scheming than simply doing what God requires. There is definitely an overlap between this form of deceit and the form we discussed in the last post—living for the moment. Living for the moment drives you and your children to look for shortcuts to avoid the impact of sin.

Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons, because he had been born to him in his old age; and he made a richly ornamented robe for him. When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him. Genesis 37:3&4

By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh's daughter. He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a short time. Hebrews 11:24&25

There was a popular song in the ‘80s which offered this line as part of its refrain:
    so I guess I'll just believe it,
      that tomorrow never comes

      When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also  desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Genesis 3:6
     So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. Ephesians 4:17-19

Dan raised an interesting question in his comment about the posts on lying. He asked, “How do we understand the "lies of sin," and how do we help our children see they have been lied to?” Dan, thank you for this insightful question. I want to take at least two posts to answer this.

We are all familiar with Adam and Eve and the Fall. What drove Eve to taste the fruit is the same temptation that drives your children to see sin as a good option. As Dan states, sin at its core is deceptive.

This deception takes at least two forms.

The first is that a particular sin will be satisfying and will do no harm. Sin, however, is never satisfying, as Ephesians 4 teaches. And as Eve painfully realized, sin does great harm.

The second form is that we believe that sin offers a shortcut to getting what we want. Translated, this means that we think we know better than God what is good for us.

Your child’s struggles with sin are tightly connected to these two points. And—as I am sure that many of you are also concluding—so are your own sins. Give this some thought. Think about the biblical narratives and find some examples of the deceptiveness of sin. We will delve more deeply into this topic in the next post. Dan, thanks again!

Then he consecrated Jesse and his sons and invited them to the sacrifice.

6 When they arrived, Samuel saw Eliab and thought, "Surely the LORD's anointed stands here before the LORD."

7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

The Olympics are winding down this weekend. There have been many successes and many disappointments. Michael Phelps grabbed the attention of the world by winning 8 gold medals and setting 7 world records. Usain Bolt was equally impressive, setting three world records by winning the 100 and 200 meter dashes and the 4x100 men’s relay. The U.S. Volleyball teams are playing for gold after a tragic start to the games. But there are heartaches as well. The images of those who lost are as haunting as those of the winners are jubilant. The U.S.4x100 relay team efforts were forever defined by the video footage of a dropped baton rolling aimlessly across the lanes of the track.

Even from birth the wicked go astray;
  from the womb they are wayward and speak lies. Psalm 58:3

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience —among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. Ephesians 2:1-3

Don Fields’ comment and questions about lying have been on my heart during these posts on lying. Children’s lies are a harsh reminder of the nature of sin. To fully appreciate the immense power and value of the cross in our lives, we must have a profound sense of the ugliness of sin. This awareness must extend to your children as well. My children and your children come into this world as natural enemies of God. They would rather lie than tell the truth. They seek first and foremost to gratify their own passions and desires, even if it means that others will be harmed. They are by nature children of wrath. That is where you must start.

Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. With his wife's full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles' feet.

Then Peter said, "Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? Didn't it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn't the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God." Acts 5:1-4

In one sense all lies are lies to God. However, as this passage in Acts shows, there is a particular type of lie that qualifies specifically as lying to God. I think of this as “lying on steroids.” Often, this lie is not about hiding things that are wicked, but about misrepresenting things that appear to be good, even righteous. This is where the greatest danger lies for children raised in Christian homes. That is why your parenting must go beyond addressing behavior.

This weekend the Beijing Olympics reach the half-way mark. I continue to be amazed at the skill, determination and stamina of those winning Gold.  Whether the sport is Fencing, Swimming, Gymnastics or one of the many others, the Olympic champions are just that – Olympic in stature. As we admire these superb athletes there is even the place for the accurate use of an over-used word – unique. There is only one Michael Phelps. Have we found the modern definition of greatness in this young man? Perhaps, from the perspective of swimming. But the things that make Michael Phelps special are things that the rest of us can only admire from a distance.

Here is another name for your consideration – Nick Challies. This is a young man who, according to his dad, struggled somewhat this year on the athletic field. Yet Nick excelled on this same field by being an example of sportsmanship. Sportsmanship, from a biblical perspective, is putting others before yourself. By practicing sportsmanship with excellence, Nick gathered the appreciation of others. And unlike Michael, Nick’s performance does not have to be unique. All Christians should embrace the goal of placing others first. You can read about Nick’s award winning season here. Thanks, Nick, for providing a biblical balance to the Gold Medal chase!

Now Amnon had a friend named Jonadab son of Shimeah, David's brother. Jonadab was a very shrewd man. He asked Amnon, "Why do you, the king's son, look so haggard morning after morning? Won't you tell me?"
   Amnon said to him, "I'm in love with Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister."
"Go to bed and pretend to be ill," Jonadab said. "When your father comes to see you, say to him, 'I would like my sister Tamar to come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare the food in my sight so I may watch her and then eat it from her hand.' "
So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. When the king came to see him, Amnon said to him, "I would like my sister Tamar to come and make some special bread in my sight, so I may eat from her hand." II Samuel 13:3-6

Children tend to lie in two types of circumstances. We looked at the first reason in the last post. The response of immediately trying to deny responsibility comes naturally to us and to our children. Children are fearful of the consequences of their sin and lie to avoid them. Christ must be shown as the one who can bring peace to a fearful heart. It is vital that this pattern be addressed quickly and thoroughly. If it is not, then the habit lying will take root and become a means to other ends.

Then the LORD said, "I will surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your wife will have a son."
   Now Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent, which was behind him. Abraham and Sarah were already old and well advanced in years, and Sarah was past the age of childbearing. So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, "After I am worn out and my master is old, will I now have this pleasure?"

Then the LORD said to Abraham, "Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Will I really have a child, now that I am old?' Is anything too hard for the LORD? I will return to you at the appointed time next year and Sarah will have a son."

Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, "I did not laugh."
   But he said, "Yes, you did laugh." Genesis 18:10-15

When children lie it is often tempting to see the reason for the lie as a mystery. For example; “Why would my child lie about taking that toy from his brother, when it is so obvious that he did do just that?” Then, deepening the mystery, parents often ask, “Why would he make up such a far-fetched story to cover up his actions? The lie and cover up seem so illogical and unnecessary.” Thus, parents sometimes tend to treat the problem as one of logic and intelligence; they puzzle over why their children would lie. Scripture solves the mystery. Children are born liars. When we sin, we lose the ability to be logical. We are blinded by self-interest (Proverbs 4:19).

When parents see their children lie, the immediate response is something like, how can I stop this! In these situations it is easy to lose sight of the biblical model of shepherding your children and resort to the world’s methodology of control. I have included the following excerpt from Instructing a Child’s Heart which addresses this very issue. Take a look at what Tedd says. It will be helpful to you as we continue this series on lying.

In his blog, Justin Taylor has posted a timely article by David Powlison & Tim Keller on blogging and passing on bad reports. The biblical principles in the article are valuable for all conversation but they are especially appropriate for internet communications. Parents, this would be a great article to discuss with your children about their internet communication. It applies directly to blogging, instant messaging, chats, and forums as well as to community sites such as MySpace and Facebook. You can find the article here.

Thanks to David Powlison and Tim Keller for writing the article and to Justin Taylor for posting it. Justin's blog, Between Two Worlds, is loaded with valuable information and links.

Truthful lips endure forever,
  but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. Proverbs 12:19

The LORD detests lying lips,
  but he delights in men who are truthful. Proverbs 12:22

We are all born liars. Not a pleasant thought, but true. Like you, your children were born with the capacity and proclivity to lie. Psalm 58:3 says that we come from the womb speaking lies. While we know the Bible teaches this, we are often shocked by our children’s lies.