May 2009 Archives

Deuteronomy 4:9 presents a challenge to God's people. Moses says to take special care that the mercies and goodness of God do not move away from your heart, your inner person. Here are two translations of  this verse.

"Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them." NIV

"But watch out! Be careful never to forget what you yourself have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren." NLT

Karen asks an honest and probing question in her recent comment. I want to thank Karen for her comment.  She is not alone in her weariness. I have listed her comment immediately below.

How can you get back that truth of God that you feel has slipped from your heart? How do you help your children who have not been brought to the arms of God since their infancy and are now wondering what has gotten into Mom that she keeps talking about the wonder of God? How do you keep from getting discouraged over the constant bowing down to idols? I am becoming weary, now that school is out and the troops are altogether under one roof 24/7.

Importance is relative. What is important to you may not seem important to your children. What is important to your neighbor may seem trivial to you. What is important to one child is a matter of indifference to another, even in the same household. Thus, it is essential to be sensitive to what each of your children thinks is important. However, what really matters is what God says is important. In one sense, your job as a parent is to help your children bring their view of what is important in line with what God says is important. That is, you want them to interpret their circumstances from God's perspective. The Holy Spirit establishes this goal in the book of Deuteronomy. In chapter four, verse nine, the Spirit directs Israel this way:

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

Toddlers are people.  They make decisions about what they think they need. The Tripps' observation that children interpret everything that happens to them provides powerful insight into the lives of toddlers.  And it is their interpretation of their circumstances that determines how they respond to events.  If a toddler suddenly perceives that a sibling has his favorite toy, his immediate interpretation might be that something is very wrong in his world. With that interpretation, the toddler may burst out crying or he may decide to retrieve his toy even if he has to fight for it.  The response flows from his interpretation of his circumstances.  In other words, he is evaluating life on the basis of what he thinks is important.  For a young child, a toddler, being satisfied is important. However, just as with older children and adults, the reality is that things do not bring lasting satisfaction.  Ultimately, what brings satisfaction in life is relationship.  And, of course, there is only one relationship that can bring true lasting satisfaction - a relationship with Jesus Christ.  To be able to give or receive satisfaction in human relationships, you must first be satisfied in your relationship with Christ. That means resting completely in Christ's provision and care for you. It means not judging the quality of your relationship with Christ by the circumstances of your life. It means being sold out to bring honor to his name in all that you do.

What is important in life?  What matters more than anything else? Whether you are conscious of it or not, these questions drive both you and your children. If you viewed the video link I posted yesterday about Clayton, it was obvious that this young man had a clear understanding of what is important.  Instructing a Child's Heart has some valuable material to help answer this very question.  It is never too soon to begin discussing the real values of life with your children. The following quotation begins on page 104 of the book.

God does not exist for man; man exists for God. Jesus Christ restores broken, fallen man to a true worship of God. The God of the Bible is the supreme object of worship. Jesus Christ saves sinners and makes them worshipers. 

Thanks again to Jacob for his comment and question about marriage. Jacob begins by asking this question:

What I haven't been able to wrap my mind around is how "A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife" has been accepted in Christian circles as meaning a legal union recognized by the state, stamped on paper, with all the benefits that the government can throw at you for being married.

To answer this question it is important to understand our social history in chronological order. It is possible to look at our country and culture today and conclude that the church is seeking validation from the state with regard to marriage. But time and the decreasing impact of the church on our culture has blurred the lines between church and state. In reality the state first drew its understanding of marriage from the church and Scripture. Historically, in the United States marriage has been understood as an institution ordained by God for the good of all people. A reading of the literature concerning the laws of this country will leave you with no other conclusion. From the April 11, 1890, edition of the New York Times, we read this quotation, attributed to the first Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, John Jay: "But however they may be established there is nothing we look for with more certainty than the general principle that Christianity is the law of the land."

Jacob raises an important question in his comments about "What is a Marriage?"  His asks what is the appropriate role of the state, if any, in determining what makes a marriage binding.  He is asking, in effect, do Christians need the state to validate marriage?  His unedited comments are posted below. 

This is the sort of question for which Christians, particularly Christian parents, must have clear, direct answers. Thanks to Jacob for asking this probing question.  What is the biblical answer? How would you answer this question for your children?  Give it some thought. I will post my response tomorrow.

Maine has become the 5^th State to change the definition of marriage. On Wednesday, May 5, 2009, Fox News reported the event on its website:

The Maine Senate voted 21-13, with one absent, for a bill that authorizes marriage between any two people rather than between one man and one woman, as state law currently allows. The House had passed the bill Tuesday.

The reasoning behind this law is that any two people have the right to decide for themselves how marriage should be constituted. They believe it is unfair and arbitrary to restrict marriage to one man and one woman. The Fox News story also reports that Republican Sen. Debra Plowman of Hampden argued that the bill was being passed "at the expense of the people of faith."

This post is the last one planned for this series, which is also the lengthiest series to date. I have taken this much time because the issues of lust and unquenchable desires are taking a heavy toll on Christian families. While pornography and teenagers have been the focus in this series, the cravings of the flesh extend to almost every area and every age of life. The fires of lust are fanned when the demands of toddlers are not challenged, but gratified, tolerated or overlooked. Children who are self-focused and allowed to indulge in self-pity become primary targets for sensuality. And, as Don Fields observed in his insightful comment, perhaps many parents are still trying unsuccessfully to free themselves from the power of lust. This is an important issue for the church today. Everywhere we turn in this world, we are urged to yield to the call of the flesh. This call must be rejected.

The phrase learning Christ appears only once in the New Testament. Paul uses this phrase when he contrasts the church and the world. In Ephesians 4:17-19, he describes what people naturally learn  because of the desires of their hardened hearts that follow the world (Ephesians 2:1-3). Then, in Ephesians 4:20, he says that the Ephesians did not come learn Christ that way. In the context of verse 20, those who are alienated, separated from the life of God--in other words, the world--learn darkness,  not Christ. Thus, sensitivity becomes impossible. That darkness produces futile thinking. Those who think and live like the world are dominated by darkness, futility and sensuality. So Paul says that this is not the way they learned Christ.