April 2010 Archives

Humans have problems seeing the implications of their own actions. We frequently try to solve one problem and inadvertently create other, unintended problems. One classic example is the introduction of Kudzu vines in the South to combat erosion. Today, over two million acres of forested land in the Southern states are covered with the Japanese import. The University of Florida says that "Kudzu will grow over anything in its path (other plants, buildings, road signs) and eventually kill other plants it covers because it blocks out sunlight. Kudzu will also girdle stems and tree trunks, break branches, and uproot trees and shrubs through the masses of vegetation produced. Kudzu has been reported to grow roughly one foot per day once established." This certainly qualifies as an unexpected consequence! This is what humans, with good intentions often do.

Parenting must embrace the reality of 1 Corinthians 15.  Why? Because there is no other way to give hope to your children.  Hope for this life must come from our awareness of the resurrection of Christ.  This, of course, presents a problem. Children, especially young ones, do not generally contemplate the events of the resurrection.  So how can they know hope in the middle of their lives--lives  that are dominated by the schedules and priorities of daily life?

The answer is that this faith and hope must first reside in you.  Paul says exactly that in 2 Timothy 1:5:

I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.

Timothy saw the hope and faith of the gospel first in his mother and grandmother. How conscious are you of the resurrection?  How much of your daily hope in life is consciously rooted in the resurrection? We are tempted to think hope will come if things go better with schedules and circumstances. While this is true to a degree, real hope comes through practical rejoicing in the resurrection of Christ.  We have been raised to a living hope. May your children see this hope in all that you do!

In a recent post we looked at the resurrection and what it means for parenting.  The reality of the resurrection is what gives the gospel power and provides hope for parents.  But this reality also presents a practical challenge for parents. Parenting has to do with immediate, daily and temporal aspects of life: behavior must be addressed, schoolwork demands to be done, clothing gets dirty, meals need to be prepared, bedtime is inevitable, children get sick. That is why the parenting life can tend to focus too much on performance and circumstances.  But when that happens, parenting skids into a life that lacks hope. To be sure, there is a fine balance that must be be maintained, but eventually a main focus on performance and circumstances will drain hope from life.

The main goal of this blog is to encourage parents in their walk with Christ as they seek to shepherd their children and lead them in God's ways. Over the last two years we have looked at numerous issues and problems that are an integral part of living for God.  I have encouraged you to trust God's Word and his Spirit over the natural inclinations of the flesh.  We are totally dependent upon Christ for the strength and courage needed to be parents who would honor him. I also have tried to be open with you about the struggles that we face and that I face in living before God in this world.

We tend to look at Scripture through one dimension--especially passages that are familiar and used for particular occasions. An example would be the Christmas story, which we tend to focus on only once a year. But by following that pattern we might miss striking applications to everyday life and faith, such as those that we see worked out by comparing Zechariah and Mary. Another example would be passages that we connect with the resurrection--like I Corinthians 15:19:  "If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men." This familiar passage is often associated with Easter or with funerals. While this is an important and appropriate application of the verse, there is much, much more that God has for our benefit in these words.

Parents often try to defend their childrearing deficiencies by protesting that their situations are unusually difficult or stressful. Parents, I believe you can relate to what I am saying.  When you snap at the children, it is because "things are difficult at work." When you don't have time to play with them, it is because you are worried about the bills and trying to sort out your financial difficulties.  When you are irritated with them instead of patiently instructing them in God's ways, it is because of relational pressures in your marriage that they just can't understand. These are the kinds of "understandable" myths we tell ourselves to avoid our obligation to trust Christ in our parenting.  The attractive route is to excuse ourselves because after all, we are only human--we can only do so much.  A mechanism such as this seems to work until we come to face to face with the example and life of Christ.