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Here is something we are excited about. Over the years we have encountered folks who are eager to tell about how the principles in Shepherding a Child's Heart have made a positive difference in their lives. Now, you have an opportunity to tell others about how Shepherd Press products have helped you as you shepherd your family towards Christ. Just click on this link to upload your own video testimonial to a special viewing platform on YouTube. We will take a look at your submission and if it is one that we decide to use we will send you a coupon for 50% off your next purchase from Shepherd Press. You won't need an expensive camera or production software. Just use your own video camera or the webcam build into your computer. We want to hear your story as you tell it. The video should be three minutes or less. Once your video is done just follow this link to submit your video. You can also see a sample video here to give you some ideas of what to say.
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It is good to be back with you. As some of you may have surmised, our life as a family has been centered around the surgery and immediate post-op recovery for my wife's brain tumor. The next phase of treatment is about to begin. I have been eager to get back to the blog. Our family also appreciates the prayers of God's people for my wife, Ruth. I will provide some updates as appropriate. We have been encouraged by the grace and care of our loving heavenly Father. He has caused us to be more in love with him and more grateful for Christ than we have ever been. This has been a blessing to us. And in these last few weeks we have been challenged to see where the real hope lies. Thus, as I finish this series on the hope of the resurrection, I trust that you can see how relevant this hope in the gospel has become to our family. As my wife has said - God certainly does have our attention. Hope in the resurrection of Christ has become more precious than I ever thought possible. So, with that thought in mind...
The final point that needs
to be covered concerning talking to your children about sex and marriage is the
joyous pursuit of sexual purity. Sexual purity is the eager and aggressive
commitment to trusting God's parameters for sexual conduct. This should be a
pursuit of joy. Sexual purity must not be defined only as a negative. The
pursuit is of sexual purity is not only to avoid what is wrong but to eagerly
pursue what is right. In this case, what is right is a passionate commitment to
engage in sexual matters as God has instructed in his Word. Such purity leads
to an active worship of God in all of life. That is something that you can talk
about without hesitation with your children. Trusting God with their sexuality
is the absolute best thing that anyone can do. You do not have to discuss every
area of sexual perversion in order to prepare children for combating sexual
sin. To be sure, you should be prepared to discuss questions about the sexual
sin that is rampant in our culture, but even this must be in the context that
God's ways are superior to the natural practice of this world.
In the last post I
suggested following an incremental approach when beginning to talk about
marriage and sexuality; this approach would then culminate in a series of
intentional, more structured discussions. These intentional discussions would be
the basis for ongoing conversations about marriage and sexuality throughout the
teenage years and beyond. The talk that the father in Proverbs 7 has with his
son is example of the incremental approach. He took advantage of a situation
when it presented itself. The more formal, intentional discussions have their
basis in passages like Genesis 1-2, Psalm 139, Song of Solomon, and Ephesians
5:25-33.
This post continues our
series on talking to your children about marriage and sex. As we discussed in
the previous post, specific topics that need to be addressed should be
introduced incrementally.
One way to begin this
incremental process is to talk about modesty. Granted, each family will likely
have its own particular view of what is modest, but all families interested in
following biblical principles will be concerned about modesty. Modesty, like
all other guidelines, must be rooted in biblical soil to effectively point your
children to Christ. In I Timothy 2, modesty is tied to a lifestyle that is
appropriate for those who worship God. Paul is, in effect, stating that modesty
is consistent with moral purity and marriage. Thus, when you instruct your
young children to dress and act with modesty, you should also connect this standard
to loving God and preparing for marriage. Even with very young children you can
explain that there are certain parts of the body that are special and reserved
for one's husband or wife alone.
The theme of this series of posts is talking to your
children about sex and marriage. As I indicated in the first post of this series,
I deliberately keep sex and marriage linked because that is how the Bible presents
them. Sex is not designed or intended for self-pleasure. Sex does bring pleasure, but engaging in sex for
the primary purpose of fulfilling personal desires is the gateway to lust. As
Ephesians 4:17-19 teaches, sensitivity to others (the biblical motivation for
sex) is the opposite of sensuality (the self-serving pursuit of pleasure).
Sensuality leads to sexual perversion and to God's harsh judgment of abandoning
people to their own desires, condemning them to the ultimate consequences of
their desires (Romans 1:18-32). Thus, when you teach your young children to
prefer others above themselves and to find joy in sharing their toys and time,
you are already preparing them to enjoy and honor God in marriage and sexual
relationships.
One of the more dreaded of parental responsibilities is
telling children about sex. This conversation is often so awkward that both
parent and child wonder what good could come from it. Sometimes, there is no
actual conversation. A parent might hand a book to his or her child and say, "Read
this and let me know if you have any questions." There is a degree of
irony in this awkwardness. On the one hand, it is almost impossible to avoid
being confronted with sex. Movies,
billboards, commercials, songs, news reports, casual conversations, TV programs
etc., form a cultural bombardment of sexual themes that invade daily life. On
the other hand, at least in most Christian households, sex is not talked about
as a part of regular family conversation. So as soon as your children have
unsupervised access to the world outside your home, they will begin to hear of
affairs, gays, oral sex, liaisons, people being "hot," people being "turned
on," masturbation, and any number of references to sexual activity,
ranging from subtle to crude. Witness one of the headlines in today's USA
Today (Jan. 20, 2010) - "Sex on TV: it's increasingly uncut and unavoidable."
So what is not talked about at home is confronted with regularity outside the
home. The reality is that your children will likely hear about sexual activity
and sexual perversion long before you actually sit down to talk with them about
what sex is. You know this and your children know this. As I said--it's awkward.
This week's Blog Special
Suffering is part of this life. Some of the suffering we bring on ourselves. Some of it comes from the cursed world that we inhabit. And some comes from the ill will of other humans. As the theologians say, we do daily battle with the world, the flesh, and the devil. Frequently it is difficult, if not impossible, to down the cause of suffering. But there is one thing that Christians can know with confidence: whatever the circumstance we face, God has brought it about for our good and his glory.
The devastation and large scale suffering that has resulted from this past week's earthquake in Haiti has once again thrust human suffering to the front page of life. For those who suffer without knowing God, the struggle is truly one without hope, but as I Thessalonians 4:13 says, Christians do not have to grieve as those who have no hope. It is this hope of knowing God in the midst of suffering that is the subject of this week's special blog offer. This week you can purchase Polishing God's Monuments, by Jim Andrews, for $5.00. Note Tim Challies' comments about this extraordinary book:
"As I closed
the cover on this book, only one day after beginning, it struck me that this is
undoubtedly one of the best books I've read so far this year. I simply can't
recommend Polishing God's Monuments too highly. I wholeheartedly agree
with Bruce Ware who writes, "To enter into this theological reflection on
suffering is to accept the challenge to grow deeply in Christ, and to cherish
the sure and certain promise of the gospel." This book gripped my heart
and helped me cherish the promises of the gospel like few books I've read
recently."
--Tim Challies (challies.com)
These blog specials are designed for readers of this blog. We not only want to say thank you for participating in the blog, but also to encourage your interest in our products. Polishing God's Monuments is one title that we believe will bring much benefit to you and others who are faced with suffering. Here is how to take advantage of this week's offer:
When you make your purchase through our online store, go the checkout and enter the code JY003POL. Using this code will allow you to purchase up to 5 copies at $5.00 each. This code may be used once per customer and will be active through the end of Friday, January 22.
We
are grateful to offer this book to you at this price.
This week's blog special!
We hear a lot about freedom
these days. But there is a difference between what the world means by freedom
and what the Bibles teaches about freedom. Dr. Rich Ganz has written a timely
and biblically insightful book on this subject.
Shepherd Press is thankful to be able to offer you the book Free Indeed, a needed resource for God's people. David
Powlison, respected thinker and biblical counselor, says:

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