Here is a comment from one of our readers about an issue related to lying. These kinds of comments are always welcome and I thank Michael for posting this. Thank you for these posts on lying. My 12 year old has participated in the sin of lying several times over the years causing him to be caught in it several times. He struggles with self-pity and I had never thought that it could be the root of his lying. Recently his 9 year old brother has contradicted his claims to the truth of a matter several times. Most recent it was concerning whether the 12 y.o. was playing a computer game when not allowed. As the parent I have no […]
Bob Bevington, co-author of Red Like Blood was recently interviewed on the Knowing the Truth radio program by Pastor Kevin Boling. You can listen to the interview anytime by going to this link. Knowing the Truth Pastor Boling will also be interviewing Ruth Younts, author of Get Wisdom!, this coming Tuesday, March 1. More details next week.
Children’s lies are a harsh reminder of the nature of sin. To fully appreciate the immense power and value of the cross in our lives, we must have a profound sense of the ugliness of sin. This awareness must extend to your children as well. My children and your children come into this world as natural enemies of God. Telling the truth and avoiding deceit is not natural for them. They seek first and foremost to gratify their own passions and desires, even if it means that others will be harmed. They are by nature children of wrath.
In one sense all lies are lies to God. However, as the passage below shows, there is a particular type of lie that qualifies specifically as lying to God. I think of this as “lying on steroids.” Often, this lie is not about hiding things that are wicked, but about misrepresenting things that appear to be good, even righteous. This is where the greatest danger lies for children raised in Christian homes. That is why your parenting must go beyond addressing behavior.
Imagine a television commercial that featured Jesus Christ as the most important person in a romantic Valentine’s Day advertisement. That seems out of place, doesn’t it? Culturally, this day is about romance, not religion. But there is an important point to be made here. The Ten Commandments teach that God is to be first in all of life. The first two commandments establish that only God is to be at the center of your life. When Jesus proclaims the he is the Way, the Truth and the Life, he is claiming the same territory. All of Scripture develops this theme. No one else may be first but God.
Children tend to lie in two types of circumstances. We looked at the first reason in the last post. The response of immediately trying to deny responsibility comes naturally to us and to our children. Children are fearful of the consequences of their sin and lie to avoid them. Christ must be shown as the one who can bring peace to a fearful heart. It is vital that this pattern be addressed quickly and thoroughly. If it is not, then the habit lying will take root and become a means to other ends.
When children lie it is often tempting to see the reason for the lie as a mystery. For example; “Why would my child lie about taking that toy from his brother, when it is so obvious that he did do just that?” Then, deepening the mystery, parents often ask, “Why would he make up such a far-fetched story to cover up his actions? The lie and cover up seem so illogical and unnecessary.” Thus, parents sometimes tend to treat the problem as one of logic and intelligence; they puzzle over why their children would lie. Scripture solves the mystery. Children are born liars. When we sin, we lose the ability to be logical. We are blinded by self-interest (Proverbs 4:19).
The next few posts will be taken from a series on lying that I did over 2 years ago. Lying in children is an important issue to understand and address, so these posts are offered to help. Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. Proverbs 12:19 The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful. Proverbs 12:22 We are all born liars. Not a pleasant thought, but true. Like you, your children were born with the capacity and proclivity to lie. Psalm 58:3 says that we come from the womb speaking lies. While we know the Bible teaches this, we are often shocked by our children’s lies.
Loving the Church, by John Crotts, continues to receive attention and praise in the Christian community. Below is a link to a post at Christianity. com. Loving the Church link. The church is not just an optional social opportunity. It is a vital component of living a life that will bring glory and honor to God. You can purchase the book at our online store. Just click on this link below. Purchase Loving the Church