Parenting

597 posts

Are Your Kids Going to Heaven?

This is a question that is asked by every Christian parent. If we look to human confirmation for the answer, life will quickly become a roller-coaster ride of ups and downs. The only answer that can truly satisfy is to realize that the eternal destiny of our children is tied to the faithfulness of God. God alone does what is right and good.   As much as we may want to, we cannot will our children to know God. Ultimately the hearts of our children can only be reached by the grace of God. They cannot earn their way to heaven. Our children, like us, began life as God’s enemies. (Ephesians 2:1-3) But God is rich in mercy. He makes […]

When True Words Become Lies

If you want your child not to lie, you must first teach them what truthfulness is. This is where biblical wisdom is needed.  Wisdom teaches your child that telling the truth is more than just saying things that are true. Being truthful means speaking accurately, without exaggerating or being misleading. Your child needs wisdom to be truthful. Truth telling is a conscious effort to supply accurate information that honors God and not self. As you know, it is possible to say things that are accurate and still hide the truth. This is the distinction that you must teach to your children.  No child is born wise. Wisdom is a skill that must be acquired. If you are waiting for your […]

Helping a Grumpy Eight-Year-Old

Eight-year-old Ryan is having a hard day. Several things he has wanted to do haven’t happened. Now a thunderstorm has wiped out playing with his friends outside. He feels he has every justification to be grumpy. Then Mom says this: “Ryan, I need your help right now in getting ready for company tonight. Would you watch your sisters for me?” “Mom! This isn’t fair. All day things have not been fair. And now you want me to watch Sarah and Michelle?  Can’t I have a break?” Mom realizes Ryan is struggling. So, instead of forcing the issue in a way that would certainly lead to discipline, she takes a minute and calls Ryan over to the couch to sit with […]

Don’t be an agnostic parent

No, I am not taking about your faith. I am talking about your children’s faith.    The Holy Spirit makes it clear that your children are born enemies of God. (Ephesians 2:1-3) He tells you your children were conceived in sin and come forth from the womb speaking lies. (Psalm 51 & 58) Romans is plain that all have sinned and have fallen short of the glory of God, that all people suppress the truth of God. (Chapters 3 & 1) The outlook for our children appears dark.   But take heart.  Paul’s word of encouragement to fathers in Ephesians 6:4 brings hope to families. Paul begins with urging fathers not to encourage anger in their children. Rather, he says […]

Suppose you lived in a third-world war zone

Imagine for a moment that you lived as many Christians do on this planet. Suppose you lived in an area that was in a constant state of warfare. This is would be where there is guerrilla warfare, or tribal disputes, or ethnic hatred or prolonged civil war. In these types of warfare, Christians are often acceptable targets.  For families living in one of these media-neglected war zones, going outside to play is an act of reckless endangerment.   You realize that the instructions you must give your children are instructions of life and death. If your kids fail to follow your directions to the letter they may pay with their life. An inviting, innocent looking object lying the ground may […]

Love your spouse, love your children

If you desire to be a loving, biblical parent you must begin by being a loving, biblical  spouse. Too often parents believe they can compensate for the deficiencies in their marriage by concentrating on loving their children. Not a good idea!  Living primarily for your children leads to making idols of your children. This is a burden that no child can bear. In the long run, it will only turn your children against you. No one is blessed when this happens. Stability in the marriage relationship is what provides stability for the family, not the other way around. Here are at least three of the reasons why this is true.    First, marriage is designed to be permanent. Children are […]

Patience or frustration?

Have you ever said something like this to your kids when things are challenging?   “Sorry I was upset. You know that I love you, but I am just so frustrated right now!”   The words, “I love you,” are buried in the middle of this defense of angry behavior. They may well be familiar words. But the problem with familiar words is that they often lose their impact and may become background noise to your children. More is needed than just words. Real, tangible actions must accompany the words of love. Let’s start with patience.    I Corinthians 13 says that love is patient.  A working definition of patience is living in the expectation of God’s care. Patience and […]

Prepare your children for the pleasure trap

In all of the ease and comfort of modern life it is easy to forget what the world is truly like. It is easy to lose sight of the need to prepare your children for a world which is not their friend. It is easy to love the world. It is so easy that God has given you a clear and dramatic command not to love it. The world has only the appearance of beauty, not the reality. But the appearance of beauty is alluring and powerful, even though it is false. Satan is hard at work putting an appealing, beautiful veneer over the horrible world that he rules. Never underestimate the danger of false beauty!   Paul describes the […]

What is Biblical instruction?

Biblical instruction is at once kind, gracious, sensitive, gentle, and authoritative. It encourages questions from the earliest days that a child can talk. Questions are good and must be welcomed and answered with care and concern. Biblical instruction avoids clichés, harsh quips, anger and frustration. It is patient and does not keep a running tally of wrongs. Biblical instruction requires humility on the part of parents. It refuses to pre-judge or jump to conclusions. Biblical instruction equips. Biblical instruction cannot be taught by rote or adherence to blind allegiance. It is fueled by hope, not fear. It does not shut down opposing points of view, but engages them.    Biblical Instruction requires parents to be sensitive, compassionate listeners. Biblical instruction […]

God defines life!

This post was excerpted from Chapter One of Instructing a Child’s Heart, by Tedd and Margy Tripp.  This section provides you with keen insight on the importance of formative instruction. We must actively teach our children, and live the reality, that God defines life. He tells and shows us the truth about what is valuable, what is worth living and dying for, what is worth doing and being, and what gives our lives significance. Rather than simply fixing short-term problems, we parents must have a vision for formative instruction from infancy to adulthood. These realities are summed up in Matthew 22:37–39: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. […]