Self-control is not about changing behavior. Self-control is the good yield of the Holy Spirit’s work producing his fruit.
Self-control is the ability to say no to my wrong desires and yes to what God wants me to do.
Prayer for Self-Control:
Father, please help me to say no to sin and yes to obedience and pleasing you. I really want to do whatever you want me to do, but it’s too hard by myself. I need your help all the time to say “yes” to you. Please help me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
from Get Wisdom! by Ruth Younts
Notice that biblically, self-control is not a behavior issue, as in “get control of yourself.” Rather, it is an issue of the gospel. Self-control is actively following what God wants via the instruction of the Spirit in his word. This makes self-control an issue of walking by the Spirit. (See Galatians 5:13-23)