Being defensive is stupid!

Posted on · Posted in Communication, Wisdom

I don’t like correction. There I said it. I like to be right. More importantly, I like it even more when you think I am right.

By openly admitting these things I have also shown a propensity for stupidity. This is but another reminder of the danger of being wise in my own eyes. If I care most about being right, I care most about myself. This is not wisdom but stupidity.

If I am to learn, I must first love discipline and rebuke. When I recoil at the correction and rebuke of those closest to me, I make myself weak. Instead of trying to find a way to challenge a rebuke, God wants me to first learn from that rebuke. Why is my child or my spouse angry with me? It is easy to say that they are wrong. It is harder to say, what is my part in this. Am I really stupid enough to think that my actions are always wise, loving and perfect, so much so that no one could think badly of me?

Learning from a correction or a rebuke, even if it is out of place, means that I care more about serving God and others than I do about myself. That is a good thing.
Being defensive is stupid, it means I have nothing to learn. The reality is that I have more to learn than I can possibly imagine!

Think about it.

To learn, you must love discipline;
it is stupid to hate correction.
Proverbs 12:1

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Jay Younts
John A. (Jay) Younts is the Shepherd Press blogger, and is a ruling elder serving at Redeemer Associate Reformed Presbyterian Church in Moore, South Carolina. He has written Everyday Talk, Everyday Talk About Sex & Marriage, Finding the Right Track, the In Touch With Paul stewardship series, and What About War. He has studied and taught about biblical childrearing for 30 years. He and his late wife Ruth have five adult children.