Parenting | Shepherd Press

School and your marriage

Posted on August 13th, 2018 · Posted in Parenting, Shaping Influences

It is August and summer is practically over. School is starting. There are lists to check: clothing, textbooks, supplies, transportation, after-school activities and more. You know the drill. However, there is one important matter that you don’t want to overlook – your marriage. The challenges of school demand much of a marriage. Time, relationship, and communication are consumed by the demands of school. The relationship between mom and dad can easily shift into one where scheduling and time pressure become the main focus. Is your marriage ready for school? Don’t.. read more

The blessing of parental authority

Posted on August 3rd, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Parenting

Parental authority is often seen as a curse rather than a blessing. This is a sad reality. Authority is a gift of God to his people and especially to families. Authority is often abused on the one hand or grossly neglected on the other. However, it is important not to frame your view of biblical authority based on abuses or personal experience. Parental authority is a daily object lesson that all of creation is under the authority and rule of the Lord of the Universe. However, viewing authority as a gift.. read more

The mixed bag that is Father’s Day

Posted on June 15th, 2018 · Posted in Parenting, Shaping Influences

Everyone has a father. That much is obvious. The problem comes when Father’s Day becomes a one-size-fits-all event. Everyone has a different life-experience regarding having a father, being a father or not being a father. Many are blown away by the faithful sacrifice of their dads. Sadly, many are also devastated by the selfishness of fathers. There are men who are thrilled with the joy of being a father. There are others who are not. There are still others who long to be fathers but are not. There are fathers.. read more

Thoughts on Being a Father — Tedd Tripp

Posted on June 14th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Godward Orientation, Parenting

As Father’s Day approaches, families prepare to honor their fathers. For me, as a father, it is a time to reflect on the meaning of fatherhood. The Apostle Paul’s observation about fathering in 1 Thessalonians 2 is a good place to start. Paul observes that he had been like a father both by example and his instruction. As for his example, both the Thessalonians and God were witnesses of how holy, righteous and blameless he had been toward them. Holy refers to him in relationship to God; he was a.. read more

Complain or praise

Posted on June 11th, 2018 · Posted in Godward Orientation, Gospel, Parenting

If your children frequently praise God for the events that happen each day, you can know that a good foundation for life is being built in their hearts. However, If you hear your children frequently complain or grumble, they are becoming a slave to their own desires. This means there is trouble ahead. Sin feeds on the demand for immediate happiness and gratification. That is why a child can go from seeming bliss to outrage in an eye blink. One moment everything is fine. Then he sees his brother with.. read more

What is Obedience?

Posted on June 3rd, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Discipline, Parenting

Obedience is a great privilege, honor and joy. Obedience is not something to use to gain a reward. Obedience is the reward! No one can make himself more acceptable to God by obedience. This means that your children must not think that you will be more accepting of them if they obey you. I know this seems awkward. So much of your life is about training and teaching God’s truth. But the truth is that one’s own obedience does not make him acceptable to God. The last thing that I.. read more

The human side of the gospel

Posted on June 2nd, 2018 · Posted in Gospel, Parenting, Sanctification, Shaping Influences

God has a role for you to play in illustrating the atoning power of the gospel. No, you have nothing do to with the sacrifice that Christ made for your sin. But, yes, you have an important part to play in defeating the impact of sin here on earth. Proverbs 16:6 demonstrates how you can show the beauty of the atonement: Through love and faithfulness sin is atoned for; through the fear of the Lord a man avoids evil. With these words Solomon reminds us of how important it is.. read more

Questions: the window to your child’s heart

Posted on May 10th, 2018 · Posted in Communication, Parenting

Questions, questions, questions: just what every parent wants, more questions! However, your children’s questions are an invaluable tool to help make you a better parent. The questions they ask provide you a window into their heart. Their questions tell you what is important in their world. Questions tell you if your child is sad or happy, what he values and what he doesn’t. Questions are huge! Moses anticipated that the law of God would be so rich and stimulating that it would bring questions from children (Deuteronomy 6:20-21). This is.. read more

Discipline and faith

Posted on April 20th, 2018 · Posted in Anger, Communication, Parenting, Wisdom

Biblical discipline is an expression of God’s love and mercy to his children. As God lovingly, gracefully disciplines us, we as parents are to give this same warm discipline to our children. It is huge that you, as a parent, see discipline as something that is positive and not punitive. Discipline is not about retribution or getting even. Discipline has the goal of producing peace. Without that goal, discipline becomes a manipulative tool that will only provide separation with your children. It is just as huge that you administer.. read more

Fathers, fear, and self-interest

Posted on April 16th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Communication, Discipline, Parenting

Men, our legacy since the fall is that we tend to either be indifferent or become angry at our children’s sin. Both responses are dangerous and destructive. When it comes to relationships, men are often intimidated and become fearful, even if we may project the opposite emotions. The two most damaging male responses, indifference and anger, stem front the same root cause – fear and self-interest. We become indifferent in order to mask our fear of not knowing what we should do. We often become angry because we have lost.. read more

Is God mad at me?

Posted on April 13th, 2018 · Posted in Communication, Gospel, Parenting, Wisdom

Do your kids think that God is only pleased with them if they obey? Do your kids think that the gospel means that they must be good so God will love them? Do your kids think that they must be good for you to like them, for you to love and delight in them? To answer these questions listen to the way your children talk about the gospel. You may be thinking that children seldom talk about the gospel. But actually, they do. Listen to your children talk. Listen to.. read more

Video: “The Gospel for Moving Targets” by Nancy Snyder

Posted on April 13th, 2018 · Posted in Instructing, Parenting, Wisdom

Now available for pre-order; ships late April / early May. The Gospel for Moving Targets is a large-format activity book that is a resource for parents and teachers to bring meaningful biblical and gospel-centered teaching to children. These hands-on devotional lessons are designed for children who struggle to sit still, keep quiet, pay attention, follow directions, and control their emotions. These lessons are also designed to help parents and teachers who love such children aim the gospel at the hearts of moving targets. Features and Benefits Curriculum for teaching the.. read more

You were born to fight

Posted on April 8th, 2018 · Posted in Communication, Criticism_, Parenting

You were born to fight. James puts it this way: “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?” It is time to stop being surprised that you and the people you love are inclined to fight. This has been reality since the Garden. We all have a part of our brother Cain embedded in us. So the question is not why do you fight, but how can you stop fighting. Here is at least one answer: consider others, especially the ones.. read more

The gospel and discipline

Posted on March 23rd, 2018 · Posted in Discipline, Gospel, Parenting

Parents don’t often think of the gospel and discipline in the same sentence. Typically, we tend to think that discipline is what you do now and the gospel is what you hope your children will embrace in the future. But Paul has a different understanding of the place of the gospel. For him, the gospel is the foundation, the hope of all of life for Christians (see Colossians 1:21-23). This means that your parental discipline must rooted and built upon the gospel. Just as you know that you can’t make.. read more

Enough Is Enough!

Posted on March 16th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Communication, Parenting, Wisdom

Ephesians 4:31 & 32 are seldom used as parenting directives. This is unfortunate. There is a powerful dynamic of grace here to help shepherd your children towards Christ. Read these words slowly: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Because of the gospel grace shown to you, Paul is directing you to rid your thoughts and your speech of the angry words of.. read more

Protect your children

Posted on March 14th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Parenting, Wisdom

Will my child honor God when I am not with him? This one question is the weighty challenge that every parent faces. It is unsettling because you won’t know until the moment comes. This is humbling, you are confronted with your limitations as a parent and as a Christian. When the moment comes it will be between your child and God. You won’t be there, you won’t be in control. Scary. How can you protect your children in these critical moments? The answer is: you can’t! But God’s truth can… read more

The making of a tyrant

Posted on March 12th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Parenting

Requiring exact, immediate, pleasant obedience is a huge blessing. This establishes the parent’s God-given authority and helps children to see the value of honoring God’s authority. However, it is possible allow children to become the center of the home and allow them to assume command. So it is important to ask, “who’s in charge?” Here is an example, that hopefully, borders on the absurd, of what happens when a child is in charge: Mom asks her almost six-year-old son, Justin, to open the front door to let some fresh air.. read more

5 Proverbs to encourage parents

Posted on March 9th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Communication, Parenting, Proverbs

Proverbs 16 has important direction for anyone in authority, especially parents. These insights help to establish authority and strengthen your parental authority. Here are some selected Proverbs from this chapter: Commit to the LORD whatever  you do and your plans will succeed. (Verse 3) This is the starting point. The commitment indicated here is totally to the Lord Lord because of your love for him is the focus of life. This is not so much about achieving a single objective as it is about committing all of your life to.. read more

Teach your kids to love God

Posted on March 8th, 2018 · Posted in Gospel, Parenting

Whether you read Deuteronomy, Isaiah, Matthew or Colossians, the first thing that God requires is that he is to be loved. Too often, when it comes to raising children, loving God is tacked on as an after-thought to obedience. The thought process may run like this: “I can’t force my children to love God, so I will teach them to obey, because I can require that.” Requiring obedience from your children appears to be a more doable task than requiring them to love God. After all, reaching the heart of.. read more

Consequences: punishment or nourishment.

Posted on March 5th, 2018 · Posted in Parenting, Teenagers, Wisdom

What kind of correction works best with teenagers? This is a generational quandary! What is the best way to positively address the areas in their lives where they need growth and direction? The time-honored favorite method of correction is consequences! But, the issue is what kind of consequences? If consequences nourish and build up a young person, this is a good thing and qualifies as biblical discipline. In case you are questioning where the idea of nourishment comes from, look with me at Ephesians 6:4: “Fathers, do not provoke your.. read more

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