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Archive for the 'Parenting' Category

Delight In God’s Commands — Really?

Posted on January 17th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Parenting, Shaping Influences

Law and delight — these are two words seldom seen as companions. You can have the law or you can have fun. Young people excited about God’s laws is not exactly the first thought that comes to mind. Instruction over iPads? I don’t think so. These comments are both comical and sad. Why? Because they both ring true. We don’t typically expect our young people to be excited about obeying God. And you can agree there is sadness connected to this fact. So how do we address this? Allow me.. read more

Doing good to get good

Posted on January 15th, 2018 · Posted in Authority, Parenting

Manipulation is a subtle trap that will lead you and your children away from the grace of God and the gospel. Jesus delivers a subtle warning in the Sermon on the Mount about the danger of manipulation. Look at Luke 6:32-33: “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.  And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that…” Manipulation is doing good to get something.. read more

A necklace to adorn

Posted on January 9th, 2018 · Posted in Parenting, Uncategorized, Wisdom

You care about your children. You want to protect them from harm. So you take the obvious precautions: you use car seats, you dress them in warm clothing, you install a security system, you take them to the doctor, you do everything possible to keep them physically safe. The same care must be given to protect their hearts. You want to protect them from the deception of the world, the flesh, and the devil. However, it is only God’s word that can accomplish this! Solomon says as much when he.. read more

Nourishing your children with Christ

Posted on November 30th, 2017 · Posted in Gospel, Parenting

The Holy Spirit instructs you to teach the person of Jesus to your children. One reason our children turn from the church and our parental instruction is that we teach them about Christ and Christianity without teaching them to learn, to know, the person Jesus Christ. Look closely with me at Ephesians 6:4: Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Fathers are commanded not provoke their children to anger. This rules out severe discipline, harsh or arbitrary.. read more

Indications of drug use

Posted on November 15th, 2017 · Posted in Culture, Parenting, Teenagers

Proverbs 18:15 teaches that the ears of the wise search for knowledge. The message is that not everything that you need to know as a parent will be handed to you wrapped in a bright warning label that says “Danger, check this out.” Sometimes the warning signs are subtle. They can easily get lost in hectic pace of life. Teenagers just getting started with drug abuse often fit into this category. Drugs are readily available today, sometimes teenagers need only your own medicine cabinet to get started. If you find.. read more

Three principles to prepare your kids for life

Posted on November 10th, 2017 · Posted in Parenting, World View

Preparing your children to face life is a huge parental responsibility!  At first, certain things are obvious: hot stoves, busy streets, harsh weather, dangerous terrain, evil people, etc., these are things your children need to know. But, there is no way to prepare and protect your children from every danger and uncertainty of life. There is too much which is beyond your control and your ability to discern all that they might need to know. You cannot fully prepare your children from life itself.  The storms in Matthew 7 come.. read more

The problem with lies

Posted on October 23rd, 2017 · Posted in Instructing, Parenting

Children’s lies are a harsh reminder of the ugliness of sin. Your children come into this world as natural enemies of God. Telling the truth and avoiding deceit  is not natural for them or you. Ephesians 2 teaches that we all seek first and foremost to gratify our own passions and desires, even if it means that others will be harmed. We are by nature children of wrath.  The Psalmist agrees in Psalm 58:3: Even from birth the wicked go astray; from the womb they are wayward and speak lies… read more

Exhausted

Posted on October 18th, 2017 · Posted in Parenting

Parenting is exhausting. There are countless remedies offered from every corner to make parenting easier and less stressful. Despite all the advice and strategies, when the day is done, so are many parents . Parents are weary not only because of the trials of the day just finished, but also weary because tomorrow is just a few hours away. In this in-between time, the tiredness often reaches its peak. The free advice and stress-reducing plans offer little consolation. Even Bible verses may seem disconnected from the pressures of getting ready.. read more

Rules: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

Posted on October 16th, 2017 · Posted in Parenting

The good: rules make life work. They tell us: how fast to drive, what time to put your children to bed, how many calories to eat, how much to pay in taxes, how to balance your budget, what is acceptable behavior at school, what time to arrive at work, how to participate in sporting events, what not to do at the swimming pool, and many useful more things too numerous to count. The bad: following rules won’t make you acceptable to God. There is a problem with rules. They lack.. read more

Why do your children fight?

Posted on October 11th, 2017 · Posted in Anger, Parenting

Why do your children fight? The short answer is, the same reason you do! They fight because they do not have what they want. As adults, we think we have moved beyond childish selfishness, so we have developed “mature” reasons for the arguments that we have. However, if you strip away the adult “sophistication” of our arguments, you will find that you are not much different from your children who squabble over a favorite toy. We believe the lie that if we are hurt a robust defense is justified. Getting.. read more

Tedd Tripp on the importance of Formative Instruction

Posted on September 23rd, 2017 · Posted in Parenting

I asked Tedd Tripp what he means by formative instruction and why it is important for parents. Tedd believes that children are impacted by everything you do as a parent. Every moment is a teachable moment. The question, then, must be what is it that you, as a parent, are teaching? Your responses to the daily events of life are formative for your children. God designed us to learn by example (Philippians 4:9), and your children learn by your example. Your goal, of course, is to have the examples that.. read more

“‘I wanted my kids to know me”

Posted on September 20th, 2017 · Posted in Communication, Parenting

Steve Jobs revolutionized the way our culture communicates. Steve Jobs was a legend. However, there was one area Jobs recognized where he was lacking. He was a private man, even from his own children. “I wanted my kids to know me,” Jobs was quoted as saying by Pulitzer Prize nominee Walter Isaacson, when he asked the Apple co-founder why he authorized a tell-all biography after living a private, almost ascetic life. “I wasn’t always there for them, and I wanted them to know why and to understand what I did,”.. read more

Pushing or Leading?

Posted on August 18th, 2017 · Posted in Communication, Parenting

Do your children feel led or pushed? Are you as a parent dominated by love or frustration? The two questions are tightly connected. Leading is born out of love and pushing is born out of frustration.  As parents we may tell our children that we demand obedience and speak sharply because we love them and only want the best for them. Most likely our children are not buying this explanation.  It feels to them as if they are being manipulated into doing what mom and dad want. But God has.. read more

More than words

Posted on August 16th, 2017 · Posted in Communication, Parenting

Solomon makes an important observation about your facial expressions. Yes, words matter. They must be used with skill and grace. But you have other significant ways that you communicate with your children. One of them is by your countenance. Positively or negatively, the look on your face makes a difference. Proverbs 16:15 describes it this way: In the light of a king’s face there is life,
 and his favor is like the clouds that bring the spring rain. In countries ruled by kings, a king’s smile was a big deal… read more

The disconnect between school and the gospel

Posted on August 14th, 2017 · Posted in Communication, Parenting, Wisdom

The gospel is about grace. School is about performance. The gospel is about receiving compassion. School is about earning grades. The gospel is about resting in the power of Christ in failure. School is about trying to avoid the shame of failure. The gospel is about acceptance in Christ regardless of performance. School is about gaining acceptance because of performance. Skilled and loving teachers and parents will work hard to bridge the gap illustrated by these comparisons. However, it is important to grasp that no matter how sincere one’s efforts.. read more

Thoughts on starting school

Posted on August 4th, 2017 · Posted in Criticism_, Parenting, Wisdom

It is one thing to say that your children are a blessing to you and that you delight in them. It is another for them to actually believe this. How well children perform cannot be the basis of your acceptance. This is a particular challenge for parents and children as the school year begins. School is about performance.  Report cards and grades are the measure of success. There are tests to be taken and teams to tryout for. But evaluating performance is not the measure of a child’s worth. No.. read more

Life is about relationships

Posted on August 1st, 2017 · Posted in Culture, Parenting, Sanctification, Shaping Influences

The most important part of our lives are our relationships. Relationships, whether good or poor, live on in the landscape of our minds. God made humans for relationships; they shape our perception of who we are and provide us with our sense of self-worth and purpose. Relationships are most fulfilling when they are rooted in the trinitarian God who is the source and model for all good relationships. God’s ultimate expression of relationship to people was to send his son, Jesus Christ, to show you and me what makes relationships.. read more

Is it stupid to be pure? part 2

Posted on July 21st, 2017 · Posted in Apologetics, Authority, Communication, Parenting, Teenagers

Did I keep my heart pure for nothing? Or asked another way, if I do stay pure, where is the fun in that? These questions are daggers pointed at the hearts of your kids. It is foolish to ignore them. It is equally foolish to answer these questions by simply enforcing rules and being angry at wrong behavior. Let me explain. Following God by living a life of purity is a path that marks teenagers as social misfits in our culture. As a parent, you have to get this! Psalm.. read more

Is it stupid to be pure? part one

Posted on July 19th, 2017 · Posted in Parenting, Teenagers

Is it stupid to be pure? People have been asking this question for thousands of years. The pursuit of purity appears to be out of touch with a life of enjoyment. Purity means dull, boring and unexciting, at least that is what modern culture teaches. Seriously, when was the last time you saw a commercial shouting out the value of being pure and decent? A song writer felt this tension 3,000 years ago. In frustration he complained that fat cats got whatever they wanted. God and biblical morality were mocked.. read more

Three truths about discipline

Posted on July 15th, 2017 · Posted in Discipline, Parenting

  There are three important considerations regarding biblical discipline. First, discipline is meant to highlight the unpleasantness of sin. Discipline, must not be confused with retribution. A child ought to be motivated to avoid discipline. It is important that parents respond with pleasant, even words in the course of discipline. This is because it is pleasant words, and not anger, that promotes instruction (Proverbs 16:20-24). Second, the fruit of discipline is not always seen immediately. This is where faith comes into play. Assurance comes from things that are not seen.. read more