There is a difference between physical beauty and biblical sexual attraction. Physical beauty is on display to be admired by all who observe it. The Holy Spirit describes the beauty of Job’s daughters this way:
“Nowhere in all the land were there found women as beautiful as Job’s daughters, and their father granted them an inheritance along with their brothers.”
Physical beauty can and should be appreciated by many. But sexual attraction is only for one’s marriage partner. Sexual attraction outside of marriage will lead to lust and, eventually, torment. It is important to teach this truth to your daughters and sons.
In Galatians 5:19-21, sensuality is listed as one of the deeds of the flesh. Sensuality is an unbridled, open, selfish pursuit of lust and immorality. The Spirit’s fruit of self-control counters sensuality. The Holy Spirit’s fruit of self-control is not the anguished self-denial of living with unmet desires. Biblical self-control is rooted in the belief that God has better things prepared for his people in sexual relations than we can possibly imagine.
That is the view of self-control that God wants you to teach your children. That is the view they will need in order to withstand the sexual onslaught of modern culture. What the world offers as sexual attraction is a lie. The notion that we can’t help being sexually attracted to any number of people is also a lie. Sexual attraction outside of marriage never satisfies. It only produces an uncontrollable hunger for fleshly cravings. Sexual attraction in this context is lust, and it is destructive to all it touches. As we mentioned earlier, true biblical sexual attraction can only be found in the context of marriage.
This attraction will feature a love and worship of God, and an intimacy and pleasure that can only come when two people are more committed to God than they are to each other. The world knows nothing of this self-sacrificing intimacy. Don’t let your children be sold a counterfeit view of sexual attraction that involves only physical stimulation and titillation. God has something far better for them. God is the God of Sex. Call your children to
entrust themselves to him as they think about sex and marriage. Teach them the difference between physical beauty and sexual attraction.