You are angry! Your son just had a minor accident with the car, your golf game for tomorrow got canceled, your neighbor called to remind you your grass is too high and you can’t stop thinking that your boss is giving you too much work and not enough appreciation. You are raising your voice, your face is flushed. If one more crazy thing happens, you will explode! The kids are bracing for the next outburst. Then you feel the buzz from your phone. You look and see it’s your boss, the one who doesn’t appreciate you. You answer the phone in a calm, relaxed voice and tell your boss you were just thinking about him and how can you help. […]
Monthly Archives: March 2019
11 posts
A judgmental spirit is a dangerous thing. It leads to doubt, mistrust and broken relationships. But there is another form of judgment that is even more destructive: the practice of judging God. When you begin to question God’s faithfulness, when circumstances are not what you wanted, you are actually judging God. When your general response to life is that life stinks, you are judging God. Why? Because the Holy Spirit says that God is causing all the events in your life to be a good thing for you. So, when you look at life and fail to see God’s goodness, even in the painful things, you are judging God. You are critiquing God based upon your perception of how your […]
If someone asked you what is your goal in life, and you answered “to pursue purity,” it would, for sure, be an unexpected answer. However, when James describes what wisdom that honors God looks like, the first word he selects is pure. Peter urges us to love one another from a pure heart. Purity is vital to a life that honors God. In the New Testament, to be pure is to be genuine, authentic, and undefiled. These are qualities that would enhance any life endeavor and any relationship! So, being pure is sounding a little more attractive. Here is an extended definition of purity: Purity is a dynamic expression of godly character. It radiates through the whole person. Purity is […]
The Holy Spirit is clear: he wants me to always be thankful. He tells me this in the Psalms of David. He tells me through the pen of Paul: give thanks in everything. This morning I am conscious of how often I am disinterested in following the commands of God’s Spirit, commands that are meant only for my good! The Spirit’s commands are not just for occasional situations when I feel “led” to follow them or when I “feel” like being thankful. The Spirit’s commands are given to focus my thoughts on following God. His direction informs me of how I should think about all that is happening to me. God is not a bystander observing me from a distance. […]
It is a challenge to patiently, lovingly, firmly confront a child who chooses to go his own way. For some fathers, it is easier to just ignore their children’s need for care and discipline. Other fathers also take an easy path by becoming angry and threaten severe consequences or engage in physical intimidation. These approaches do not honor God. They do not bless the child. These two damaging responses, indifference and anger, stem front the same root cause – fear. Fathers, are you listening? God created men to be confident, compassionate, caring leaders. But then, there was the fall. While Eve chose to verbally engage the serpent, Adam, who was with her, chose not to protect his wife. Instead, in fearful […]
The full value of your instruction to your children will not be seen immediately. If you invest in changing your children’s behavior your investment is only for the moment. Results will often be quick and impressive, but they will also be temporary. When behavior is the goal, how well your children perform is the main indicator of success. Investing in behavior brings immediate dividends such as anger, frustration, and manipulation. In contrast, investing in heart change is investing in your children’s future. Heart change is for life. Pleasant words, consistent loving discipline, taking the time necessary to really know your children, loving God’s word for yourself, humility—these are indications of investment in heart change. Investing in heart change may not […]
Men, pornography is a lie. You think you are attracted to it because of sexual temptation. That is a lie of the enemy! Yes, the lure is about sexual lust is real. But the attraction to pornography is also about the degradation and humiliation of women for your own lusts. Indulging in pornography promotes and aids human trafficking, slavery, physical abuse, emotional abuse, rape and, in some cases, death. In short, viewing of pornography is finding pleasure in the slavery and destruction of women. The enemy has deceived you into thinking that pornography is about fulfilling your sexual fantasies and lusts. The enemy is laughing all the way to hell as, literally, tens of millions of men and women believe […]
The world is looking for peace. Whether it is in the children’s playroom or at an international negotiating table, peace is described as the absence of conflict. Thus, terms are sought to minimize or eliminate conflict. But this is a futile pursuit. A mom knows that discord and self-service rules young hearts. The sad reality is that diplomats attempting to negotiate peace treaties ignore this most basic truth: people are born at war with God and with each other. The human heart will not naturally be drawn to peace. Conflict is the natural disposition of the heart. Conflict comes because we are born driven to gratify the cravings of our bodies. (Ephesians 2:1-3) This means that it is dangerous to […]
One of life’s hardest lessons is to realize that true satisfaction is found only in God. There are many pretenders but only God is sufficient to give meaning and purpose to your life. Apart from God every single relationship and endeavor you pursue carries the reality of disappointment. One of the cruelest things you can to do is to expect others to provide for you what can only be found in God. No human can bear the weight of being God for you. Practically, what does this mean? Children cannot bear the weight of being your satisfaction in life. This will cause you to either ask too much from them or to ignore their weaknesses. In either case, you will […]
It may be possible to control behavior. However, control of the heart is another matter. As Tedd Tripp teaches, you can shepherd your child’s heart. But you cannot control his heart. So the purpose of your authority as a parent is to shepherd your children, to build them up, to strengthen them. But attempts as controlling children without shepherding them will lead to frustration. Over time attempts at control through rules will lead your children away from Christ (Colossians 2:23). Controlling your children in this way will weaken them and tear them down. Paul in 2 Corinthians 13:10 says that God gave him authority for building up and not for tearing down. This is important. As a parent, you want […]