Solomon describes the importance of the heart in Proverbs 4:23: “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” The heart is like an artesian spring. All our hopes, dreams, and desires gush from the heart. Every drive for meaning and significance originates in the heart. Our behavior flows from the heart—it isn’t caused by circumstances or other people. The heart, with its passions and desires, is the wellspring of life. Recently, Radio Shack had a sale on little matchbox-size remote control cars. “What a fun thing for the grandchildren to play with at grandpa’s house,” I thought. The next week they were all at our house for a family meal. I got the […]
Ruling Desires
112 posts
December is here and that means Christmas gifts. Gift giving is a double edged sword. When a gift is given that is a delightful surprise or a longed for treasure, all is well. The giver is happy, the recipient is thrilled, the tree seems to be bigger and brighter. But when the gift that was desired does not appear, the tree is somehow not as pretty and spirits are dampened. A cloud hangs over the festive atmosphere of Christmas Day. And, of course, the disappointment of the missing gift is not limited to children, mom & dad can know this ache as well. Not getting the gift that is wanted can happen for several reasons. The budget dictates trips […]
Something is counterfeit if it appears to be genuine but is not. The problem with counterfeit money is that you can use and spend it and often the recipient will not recognize it for what it is. Then one day you attempt to use what is counterfeit with someone who knows what is genuine. Not only do you not get what you wanted but the fake money you have is forfeit as well. Gift giving can be counterfeit or it can be genuine. Giving gifts to others can be a very good thing. But to be good, the gift must first be genuine. Just as we can’t earn our acceptance with God, neither can we fully earn the acceptance […]
Giving to honor God is not necessarily the same as giving to make your child happy. In fact, the two goals may be in opposition to each other! The ultimate example of giving to glorify God is Jesus Christ. Christ’s gift was selfless, pure and holy. Let’s take a look at each of these three qualities. While we can never match these qualities in our own gift giving, nonetheless, they are the standard. Selfless From a human perspective there was nothing in what Christ did that was a benefit to him. His joy was in doing what the Father wanted. He did not give selfishly, to get something back. One trap in gift giving is the expectation of appreciation. You […]
The middle years of 5 to 12 are years of transition. One aspect of this transition is preparing for war. Parent, you are the active combatant as you protect your 5 year old. But when he turns 12 he must be ready to fight spiritual battles without always having your oversight. We are often shocked at seeing young children carrying weapons and being in the middle of gun battles in other parts of the world. But this uncomfortable picture is much more fitting for our children than we care to admit. Developing character in your children is preparing them for a war that is real and even more deadly than the ones we cringe at seeing on the nightly news. […]
One of our readers asked the following question: “Any thoughts on what a mother can do when the son is trapped in porn and the father is reacting the exact same way as your “what not to do” example? I know my son needs a man to shepherd him through this, and I want so badly for his father to be that man. But my husband refuses to “see” the need to shepherd his son in this way, and I’m feeling helpless between trying to be respectful/honoring of my husband but proactive in helping my son.” Here is the excerpt from the post that the mom is referencing: “You just confirmed that your fifteen-year-old son, Justin, has […]
Patience is the fruit of the Spirit. Practically, patience means to live in the expectation of God’s care regardless of the what the circumstances of life appear to be. Our stability in this life depends upon the care of God, not in our ability to predict outcomes. Life is often hectic, full of the unplanned and unexpected. But nothing is unplanned and unexpected for God. He alone can deliver on what he has planned. Even though Jesus Christ has commanded us not to worry, there is always some circumstance, some event that causes us to doubt God’s faithfulness. So we act on our own anxious assessment instead of seeking God for the path that will honor him. This worry […]
You remember Jonadab. He was the opportunistic enabler of Amnon’s sensual cravings for Tamar. Today, Jonadab would have earned a rich living on Madison Avenue. He was intimately familiar with the unholy trinity of youthful passions: You can have it. You deserve it. Do what it takes to get it now. This is the formula of TV commercials aimed at youth. They offer fast food, beer, cars, clothing, and safe sex all all nicely packaged in the self-serving phrase of drink responsibly. Paul was also aware of this unholy trinity when he warned a young Timothy to flee youthful passions. Sin’s deceitfulness particularly targets teenagers and young people. Jonadab, in 2 Samuel 13, addressed the youthful lusts of Amnon. Amnon’s […]
When you are led by fleshly desires instead of spiritual ones, peace does not follow. Your son eats some of the cookies that were just baked for dessert. His momentary enjoyment is quickly replaced by the fear out of being found out. The scheming begins. Since he took the shortcut of instant gratification, now he must look for a scheme to avoid the consequences of acting on his desires rather than obeying Mom and loving God. So, the flesh hatches a plan. He puts the cookie plate on the floor, calls the dog in from outside and shows him the plate. Then he runs to tell Mom that the dog knocked the plate off the counter and ate the cookies. When […]
Immediate gratification comes with a built in set of blinders as standard equipment. If what we want is what we want and we must have it now then there is little or no thought given to the impact of the pursuit of immediate gratification. David gave no thought to what would happen after he had Bathsheba. Amnon could focus only on Tamar and never stopped to think that his lust would cost him his life. Ananias, with his wife Sapphira, thought only of the acclamation they would receive from people and thought nothing of lying to the Holy Spirit. These individuals thought only of their immediate cravings. But the desire for instant gratification also comes with a set of blinders […]