Marriage

37 posts

Hear Her: Listen Actively

From cell phones to incessant demands from work, many guys feel justified in developing the ancient art of zoning out. As men redeemed by the precious blood of Christ, the grace we have received should impact every area of our lives— including our ears. It is likely the understatement of the century to say that our wives often have helpful, wise, and biblically insightful things to say. In other words, don’t be a fool: “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice” (Prov. 12:15). One of the ways that we can honor, love, and encourage our wives is to zone in and hear them. This takes effort on our part. […]

Guard Your Wife’s Heart Too

For previous entries in this series, see “Pursue Godly Manhood” and “Don’t Let Chivalry Die on Your Watch.” Guard Her Heart Too Protecting your wife includes protecting her spiritually, not just physically. To this end, a Christian husband should exercise great care in guarding his wife from the many threats to her spiritual health. As you talk about life, jobs, kids, neighbors, church members, and money, be sure that your speech does not tempt her to sin. My wife and I communicate regularly; it is a gift in our marriage that has paid many dividends. However, I have foolishly steered many conversations away from healthy discussion to rank gossip and slander. We need Paul’s words stamped on our brains and […]

Don’t Let Chivalry Die on Your Watch

Let me be clear: being a nice, moral guy will not save you, nor will it save your family. God’s wrath against your sin is only satisfied by Christ (cf. 2 Cor. 5:21). But even though acts of kindness are not the root of our justification, they are certainly the fruit of our justification. After rejoicing over God’s sovereign grace toward sinners, Paul goes on: “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them” (Eph. 2:10). Therefore, acts of kindness and love toward our spouses are not a works-based self-rescue plan; they are the overflow of our joy in Christ and the pursuit of joy in serving […]

Pursue Godly Manhood

There seems to be a renaissance of manliness in our day. Even Walmart and other major retailers have started capitalizing on the new interest in beard oil, mustache wax, and work boots. Although I am moderately encouraged by these recent developments, there is still a great deal of confusion to slice through when it comes to manhood in our culture. More alarming, there seems to be confusion about godly manhood among Christian husbands. Let me be clear: there is nothing wrong with beards, flannels, bonfires, work boots, pocket knives, pickup trucks, or hatchet throwing. In fact, it might do some of us a lot of good to put our phones down and spend some time in the woods. Nevertheless, God’s […]

We Need Better Men

We need better men. No, we don’t need perfect men, but we do need better men. Even though Christ is the only perfect man and the sole head of the church, the body of Christ needs men of integrity and grit. Although this book is written with love and goodwill, it is a direct call to war. It is a call for Christian men to make war against the things that belittle the glory of God, wound their wives and children, and disqualify them from fruitful ministry. At the outset, I want to lay down a gauntlet by urging you to examine yourself. Has the gospel of Jesus Christ come to you in power? By God’s grace, have you come […]

Introduction to “Man Up, Kneel Down”

Many godly men and women have put pen to paper and produced wonderfully God-exalting books about marriage. It is with great humility (and some frayed nerves) that I offer this simple work to you, my brother, for your joy and the glory of God. In one sense, the sacred institution of marriage has always suffered violence at the hands of our spiritual enemy and man’s own inherent depravity. However, our day is one in which the Christ-magnifying institution of marriage is enduring not merely bullets and hand grenades, but atomic bombs. The aim of this book is simple yet multifaceted. I want to lovingly charge Christian men to embrace the well-known yet seldom-lived call of Ephesians chapter five: “Husbands, love […]

Announcing “Man Up, Kneel Down” — A New Book for Husbands

“Man Up, Kneel Down by J. Aaron White encouraged me as a husband and gave me practical suggestions for how I can grow in my love and care for my wife. You can’t ask for more out of a book. Good marriage books are like vitamins, you gotta keep taking them to benefit. So, get a copy of Man Up, Kneel Down and get the spiritual nutrition you need to keep your marriage growing and healthy.” —Marty Machowski, author of The Ology and Parenting First Aid: Hope for the Discouraged Many Christian husbands know and affirm the apostle Paul’s command: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). However, busy schedules, […]

Empty Boxes, Hurting Hearts

Another Valentine’s Day has come and gone. Gifts were given. Some carefully planned and thoughtful, others, not so much. The flowers are in their vases, the chocolate has been enjoyed, the calendar has a new date. But the most important question still remains. How is your relationship? Did last night help to make it stronger? Do doubts still remain? Does the new morning bring new worries? The answers to these questions are found in the relationship that matters most – your relationship with God. Knowing and loving God gives significance to all other relationships. This morning after, one thing is certain above all others, God has not changed. He is constant. This means the content of love does not change. […]

Dr. Ernie Baker – How to Choose a Spouse

Click on the link below for the interview! Whatever terms you use to describe relationships, one thing is sure: Dating is hard. Pastor and professor Dr. Ernie Baker gives us advice on what to look for in a potential spouse from his book Marry Wisely, Marry Well. Lisa also grills Dr. Baker on why he once drove 700 miles overnight (hint: a girl was involved), and what happened when his fiancee had another guy enthusiastically chasing her. Listen at www.boundless.org.    

A Man and His Dream

In 1953 Hugh Hefner published the first issue of a magazine that would become an American icon. The magazine became symbolic of a nation in pursuit of pleasure, the objectification of women, and moving beyond biblical morality. Hefner framed his views with a long-running series of articles that attempted to show the tyranny of biblical morality and historic Christian theologians like John Calvin. He wanted to see the Bible thrashed and tossed aside. Hefner’s “philosophical” views were a thin veneer that covered his own fantasy that women served no higher end than to fulfill his perverted desire. Hefner died this past Wednesday, but his dream lives on. This dream has shaped the way our culture views women and God for […]